My house is now ready to sell and will be sold within the next two months. The finality of selling the house and the degree to which this is forcing me to let go of so many hopes and dreams and any ounce I had left of my former existence seems to be dredging up so much emotion for me. I am having to get rid of so many things that it is just not practical to move, things that I agonized over picking the perfect one of, then took such good care of, and held on to...the house that I poured my love into making everything just the way I always dreamed of...the life that I was building...it is so hard for me to just erase it all from my life like none of it ever existed. When I try to "take" any of that memory or life with me, it just highlights the juxtaposition to my current situation and hurts too much. If this was always my reality, I'm sure I'd be fine with it, but when you are constantly comparing it to the dream you had and what you wanted from this life, it falls short to say the least. I look forward to some day in the future when I have created so much history between this day and then, that there are foundations on which I stand that have nothing to do with my life "before." A day when I have some sort of context that takes me so far from where I was at before or am at now that it isn't even relevant to dwell on. A day when good and bad once again become black & white, where superheroes and fairies really do exist, magic is possible, and I just live to love, eat, and explore.
Here are a few photos to "keep you" as Odin would say.
The boys from Magnum P.I.
Good guy
Bad Guy
The Superhero undercover...
The getaway vehicle...
Super Odin & his sidekick, Z Boy...
The little Hummel...
"So damn easy to say that life’s so hard
Everybody’s got their share of battle scars
As for me I’d like to thank my lucky stars that
I’m alive, and well
It’d be easy to add up all the pain
And all the dreams you sat and watched go up in flames
Dwell on the wreckage as it smolders in the rain
But not me, I’m alive
And today you know that’s good enough for me
Breathin' in and out's a blessin' can’t you see
Today's the first day of the rest of my life
And I’m alive, and well
I’m alive, and well"